Before you became a mother, did you swear to yourself that despite acquiring this new title it would not change who you are?
Many mothers-to-be make the same promises to themselves, but as one of if not the most life-altering experiences there is, motherhood can mean you change in lots of different ways.
Yet this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. A new blog post for Momtastic by Candace Alnaji picks apart why becoming a mother means you will fundamentally change – but for the better.
She admits she wasn’t full prepared for the “total demolition and ground-up style of rebuilding” of the person she was, but admits she prefers the “mom” version of herself much more.
“I haven’t lost myself to motherhood, nor am I a completely different person to who I was before I became a mom,” she asserts. Rather, she says, she is an “enhanced” version of the person she was before.
One aspect of this is that she is tougher. She says the physical sacrifices and trauma mothers undergo during pregnancy and childbirth are just the beginning. “There’s a reason the phrase ‘tough as a mother’ exists. Moms are strong,” she emphasises.
Candace also acknowledges that she now far less selfish. Although she still tries to take care of herself, “long gone are the days when every second of every day was spent thinking about myself – and that’s not a bad thing.”
Along with the loss of selfishness comes a new found level of compassion for others, she continues. “As a mother, you see the world differently.”
Finally, Candace acknowledges that she is “less rigid”. Before, she wouldn’t let anything interfere with her plans but now “being a mother eliminated many things from my control, and made me more willing to roll with the punches”.
Does this all sound familiar? Have you changed since you became a mother? Do you think it’s for the better? Share your motherhood story with us!